This poem is dedicated to A.A. Milne. Respectfully. Even though it may not seem like it.

When I am feeling very blue
And all the world is dark
I close my eyes and think,
“The world can suck it! I’m a shark!”

When I am feeling all alone
While sitting in the park
I think of just how great it is
That I’m a goddamn shark!

I’m a shark, I’m a shark!
Hell, I’m king of the sharks!
And sharkness is how I’ll make my mark
And I get the very best character arc
Because I am a huge goddamn shark!

Sometimes the world is filled with fear
Of hope there is no spark
But nothing really scares me here
‘Cause I’m King Fucking Shark!