Dangerous spanking games with superstrong hominids

Omega Gang For Life

16 notes

albatchy asked: Duende - Spiderwing (the wonderful brotp)

Duende - Unusual power to attract or charm

"Ok, so." Dick puts Peter’s hand on his hip. "Pretend I’m the girl."

Peter snorts. “I don’t think anyone in the world could pretend you’re a girl. Also, why are you teaching me how to do a Viennese waltz on top of the Gotham Mutual building? I figured we’d be practicing in a gym or something, all I need is to be able to make a good impression.”

"I don’t know, it just…seemed like a good spot. Lots of floor space." Dick purses his lips, staring fixedly into the air for a moment. "Anyway, gimme a second…all you really need to do is follow my feet. Copy what my feet do but backwards."

"What you do but backwards. Got it."

"On three. One, two, three…"

They whirl around the roof, Dick keeping up a continuous stream of commentary about how Peter needs to move, how to navigate a crowded dance floor, how to handle people cutting in, and the best way to avoid stepping on anyone’s toes. The pace is fast, but the dance is simple, and Peter picks it up pretty quickly. “This is fun.”

"Isn’t it? I love dancing."

They spin to a stop and hear applause.

Dick looks up and blinks. “Can I. Uh. Can I help you?”

Stephanie, Cass, Dinah, Helena, and Zinda are perched on the edge of the rooftop, watching them with fascinated concentration. Tim is tucked into a corner between a pipe and the little roof door, a camera in one hand. Jason is across from Tim, phone out, the screen glowing as snaps a picture. Damian’s sitting on Bruce’s shoulder at the other end of the roof.

Peter grins weakly. “Hey…guys?”

"Oh, don’t let us stop you.” Zinda grins and eats a handful of popcorn. “I haven’t been to a show this good in ages.

Filed under peter parker dick grayson spiderwing fanfiction albatchy ask and be answered

5 notes

Anonymous asked: I hope you don't mind, but could you do a Ultracrepidarian fic, featuring Agent Flint, who keeps going to your other OCs for information/help

It is delightful to me that Agent Flint has a fan. ^_^

Ultracrepidarian - Of one who speaks or offers opinions on matters beyond their knowledge

"Dr. Baker?"

Carol looks up from her weeding, surprised. “Agent Flint! We weren’t expecting you, is something wrong?”

Arthur grins nervously. “Uh. Not really? I wanted some advice, and I thought you’d be the person to come to.”

Carol blinks, frowns, and then stands up and tugs off her gardening gloves. “Should we head inside to my office?”

"Oh, no. No. Not like professional advice.”

She peers at him. “…ok, you have my attention.”

There’s a long pause, and then he says it all in a rush. “What’s the best way to get Huntress to notice me?”

"I." Carol blinks. "That’s…not really my field, hon. She’s a little too…straight…for me. Maybe you should be asking my wife, she’s better with the whole dating thing."

Shelly frowns when he asks her, thinks about it for a moment, and then says, “I don’t know, honey. DC stuff isn’t really in my wheelhouse. Did you ask Carol?”

Arthur grins nervously. “She said to ask you.”

"Well…" She chews on her lip. "She’s sort of like a…Batman-type person, right? She wears all that purple? I mean…you could ask her for a crossbow lesson."

Arthur sits down on the garden wall and sighs.

"Hey, Agent Flint! What’s up?"

He looks up with a start. “Hello, Merlin. I didn’t know you were home.”

"Just got home. It’s semester finals, I had a half day." Merlin hops up onto the wall beside him. "Normally I’d hop over and go bug someone, but everyone else is busy. How was your vacation?"

"Hot." Arthur laughs. "Not that it’s ever not hot.”

"Yeah, I hear Haiti’s like that. Is your sister doing ok?"

"Better now that she’s out of the hospital. And the baby’s loud as hell." Arthur grins. "It was a good trip." Then he pauses. "…you don’t have any good tips for how I could get Huntress to notice me, do you?”

Merlin blinks. “Dude, I’m seventeen. I got my first real boyfriend by accident. Why are you asking me?

Filed under special agent arthur flint merlin baker carol and shelly multiverse fanfiction anonamouse ask and be answered

16 notes

Anonymous asked: Capernoited Nohmmy please :)

Have I mentioned that this is by far the most popular word?

Capernoited - Slightly intoxicated or tipsy

Tommy’s back is against the wall and his feet are both off the ground, his legs wrapped tight around Noh-Varr’s waist. He’s clawing holes in the back of Noh-Varr’s t-shirt (something for the Fermilab Muon Slo-Pitch Softball team, apparently?) while Noh does something mildly evil and definitely sexy to his throat.

He lets out a debauched moan, and then gets distracted and starts laughing, and then Noh-Varr hiccups and says, “Sorry. Sorry. Scuse me. I have a song stuck in my head.”

"Which one?" Tommy blinks at him fuzzily. "Good song?"

"It’s…it’s the one, you know the one, da-da-da-da-da-DA-da…"

"I love that song. Can you put. Uh. Put me down? I wanna suck your dick.”

Noh-Varr hiccups again. “But if you do that then you’ll just regret it in the morning. You’re very drunk.”

Tommy peers at him. “So are you. Who says you won’t regret it in the morning?”

"Uh." Noh-Varr blinks owlishly. "I’m older than you. I know better.”

"Cradle-robber."

"Nymphomaniac."

"Ok, look. Look look look. How about…" Tommy trails off, staring into space, before regaining his train of thought. "How about we don’t have sex. But then we have a ton of sex in the morning when we’re sure.

Noh-Varr nods gingerly. “That’s very. Mature. While still involving us having sex. I like it.”

"I’m gonna throw up now."

"I’ll carry you to the bathroom."

Filed under tommy shepherd noh varr nohmmy young avengers fanfiction anonamouse ask and be answered

1 note

ducttapefae replied to your post “Miswrite of the night: mind wandering, almost wrote that an impending…”

well my first instinct is Carlos and Cecil but who would they invite into a threesome?

Numair Salmalin, but probably only in my bizarre crossover fever dreams.

ladynara replied to your post “Miswrite of the night: mind wandering, almost wrote that an impending…”

Lemme guess- Tony Stark/Bruce Banner/Hank Pym?

Not them either! Oddly enough, the story has nothing to do with science at all—it’s about wrestlers.

So. Uh. There’s that.

Filed under ducttapefae ask and be answered ladynara